Brian Bald
Dec 02, 2008

This blog is dedicated to promoting the ideas of the unqualified and under-informed. With that in mind, “12 Angry Homers” is a weekly feature highlighting the rants and raves of a graduate from each of the 12 ACC schools (note: eventually…we are a few homers short at the moment) as their beloved teams make their way through the football & basketball seasons…

Homer #1: E-Dubs

Go ahead and draft up the Deed for the University of South Carolina because Clemson OWNS them. Clemson delivered an improbable beat down on Senior Day to the Gamecocks to the tune of 31-14. Clemson has now won 10 of the last 12 games against the Coots and leads the overall series 65-37-4. James Davis ran for 94 yards and 3 touchdowns in his last game in Death Valley. C.J. Spiller also contributed with 199 all purpose yards and broke the single season record for receiving yards by a Clemson running back with 423 yards. Clemson even gave the Ole’ Ball Coach a little taste of his own medicine with a trick play that resulted in a 50 yard TD to Jacoby Ford. Congratulations to Dabo Swinney who was named the Head Coach of the Clemson Football Program on Monday after leading the Tigers to a win over rival South Carolina and into bowl eligibility. I am excited to see what kind of staff he will put together in the near future.

As far as Bowl games go, Clemson will get the nod over several schools in the ACC for the better bowls due to our loyal fan base. In an economic downturn, teams with the most fans that will show up and spend money will be sought after by bowl officials. I feel the Tigers will end up in the Gator Bowl with a rematch of the 1981 National championship game versus Nebraska or the Music City Bowl against former Clemson Alum Coach Johnson’s Vanderbilt Commodores. I feel the marketability of the 1981 rematch will bring several fans to Jacksonville. They also will not invite the loser of the ACC championship game b/c fans will not come back to Florida after watching their team lose in Tampa. It would help Clemson’s chances for a bid to the Gator bowl if VT beats BC in the ACC Championship game. Hopefully, Coach Dabo Swinney will bench Cullen Harper in the 2nd half of the bowl game and let the “Willy Korn Era” begin in Clemson.

Homer #2: Moncrieffe

I don’t want to talk about it.

Homer #3: Benz

Is it conceivable that the ACC is better than the SEC?  Is it possible that an offense “that’ll never work in the Big Six” ran through the preason No. 1?

Paul Johnson knows how to coach a team.  His halftime speech of “don’t leave this locker room if you don’t believe” is how to pump up and coach up players.  Chan Gailey brought in high caliber players over the last two years and Paul Johnson has made the boys into men.

Roddy Jones averaged 16.5 yards per carry.  Jonathan Dwyer 7.2, and the Yellow jackets talleyed 409 yards of rushing on the day. Did Knowshon Moreno say Dwyer who? Moreno and the entire Bulldog team was kept under 100 yards for the game.

Georgia Tech went into Saturday with last January’s goal. Beat Georgia. There was no other goal. No ACC title mattered. “That would’ve been the icing on the cake,” Roddy Jones said. “But without the icing, the cake’s still pretty good.”

There’s hope that GT receives an invite to the Chick-fil-A bowl, which would give the team that rang up 86 points in two games over the high speed defenses of Miami and Georgia another chance to route an SEC opponent.

Homer #4: Beef & Charlie Chalupa

Thank god this football season is drawing to an end.  The Terps just really piss me off.  Sure, some sort of [insert corporate name] Bowl against some other middling team will come along in a few weeks.  Sure, I’ll watch it.  And I’m sure it will suck.  No way to know which Terps team will show up for any given game, and the story of this season was blown opportunities.

It’s time for a new D coordinator.  Its time for a new QB.  The running game was strong, and should continue into next year.  Fridge wont go anywhere, he is too big to move.  But the D needs an upgrade.

Terps BBall had a nice big win over #5 Michigan State, a team missing its two best players.  The team then went out and got stomped.  Also, a rare matchup between Georgetown and Maryland happened the other night.  Georgetown held Maryland to their lowest point total in ages.  Guess thats why the Terps never want to play the area teams.

I think that its about time for a proper DC area college basketball tournament.  Georgetown, Maryland, American, George Washington, George Mason would headline with a bunch of the smaller local schools like UMBC, Old Dominion, etc to fill the ranks.  I would watch that.

Homer #5: Krystal

Is it NEXT football season yet?!? Miami got my hopes up this year and dropped them like they were hot! At least we will make it in to some bowl, better than last year. Even if it is the Waste Management Crappola Bowl…..

At least Miami basketball is still ranked. #21!!! Who would have ever thought that our basketball team would be ranked and our football team wouldn’t be????

Give the Canes football program two years and we will be back in the running for the National Championship Game…..yea I still bleed orange and green….GO CANES!

Homer #6: Ned Ryerson

We beat Duke. Kind of like hooking up with a girl from Duke, nothing to write home about, but at least you got laid.

Homer #7: The Steve Smith

I’ve been yelling about it, and the national media is finally listening. Lots of articles about Russell Wilson as your ACC POY floating out there now. All who watched his electrifying 29 yard TD run, or any of his TD passes Saturday, understand why. 226 straight passes without an interception, a span during which he has thrown 16 TDs and rushed for 4 more.

The game was very exciting, especially due to the loud, over-weight Miami fans sitting behind us. The U is adding 1,000 seats thanks to revenue gained from this family’s concessions purchases. Seriously though, I don’t understand why Miami changes quarterback after the first quarter. They are ahead 14-7, and Marve was 5-6 for 90 yards and a touchdown. New QB = INT. The Wolfpack used 180 rushing yards in the first half to pull ahead 17-14, while Miami struggled to get back on-track. Add a nice FG in the third, and a rushing TD by the Canes and it was 21-20.  NC State fought back with three straight scores to go up 38-21. Miami never regained the momentum they had in the first quarter and were out-scored 31-7 after changing play-callers. Coach Shannon had to feel stupid.

The difference lately is the health of LB Nate Irving. He had tackles for loss, QB-pressures and a late interception. I would also like to point out the performance of senior tailback Andre Brown. He is a
punishing runner who rarely goes down on the first hit. He pounded the Canes for 93 yards on 12 carries and 2 touchdowns. He finished with exactly 2,500 yards and 21 tds in his career, with a career high 728 yards this season. He should almost certainly get a look from an NFL team, due to his combination of speed, power, and hands. Also of note, Pack whistled for only 2 penalties for 25 yards. Eat your heart out, Chuck Amato.

Looking toward bowl possibilities, due to the overall 6-6 record, NC State by rule should only be eligible for an at-large berth. The ACC has 9 bowl contracts, and 10 bowl eligible teams (And is largely
under-rated as a conference). State is the only bowl-team with a record below 7-5. This is complicated further by Maryland telling the EagleBank Bowl they cannot accept an invite from them… so this might mean Maryland gets an at-large and NC State goes to EagleBank. Either way, it’s bowling time. With Wilson coming back, along with a slew of young stars, the future is bright for Wolfpack football.

Homer #8: 46 East

Wait. Stop the presses. Get Howie Mandel on the phone. You mean to tell me that a QB with the national, all-time 5th highest high school total in career offense can play QB pretty well at the college level too??? No way I say. Ha ha ha, great joke. Could Kim Kardishan go from being a nobody, to making a sex video and then becoming famous and have mainstream middle class America fall in love with her like she’s Hannah Montana or something? No way. Get real, you are an idiot. Stop bothering me.

Ok, now you’re telling me that this same QB was also the #2 high school quarterback ever in the state of Virginia?? Behind only Ronald Curry but ahead of Michael Vick and Allen Iverson? Nonsense I say. What does high school success have to do with college success? Nothing I say. Just because George W. sucked once as a president didn’t mean he was going to suck in his second term as president. Oh wait.

Back to my point. This high school stud QB you talk about shouldn’t play QB in college because he is only 5’11”. This is preposterous. No 5’11” QB has ever had success in college. Who would ever believe something so crazy? Sit down and shut up while I coach because I know football and you know nothing. Imagine, playing the #2 QB ever in the state of VA at QB in college, what an idiotic idea.  You are a moron. You amuse me with your stupidness.

Oh wait, I’m sorry people, I thought I was Al Groh for a second. Forgive me. I’m zapped out of it now. But if I ever get the opportunity to ride someone else’s coattails for an entire career and then act like I know everything simply because I rode those coattails, I’m turning back into Al Groh quicker than Ben Affleck can flash his “I helped Matt Damon write Good Will Hunting” card.

Every Wahoo I know has been screaming for Vic Hall to play QB at Virginia since he committed early during his junior year some 5 years ago. Al Groh, however, in all of his infinite NFL, Bill Belicheck, Bill Parcells wanna-be wisdom, declared that all QB’s should really be over 6 feet tall, and that is the model that we are going to follow. Only wait a second, Al Groh isnt Bill Belicheck, and he isn’t BIll Parcells, and he completely, totally, utterly blew the call on this one. Which is about the 93rd player he has done that with during his 8 years at UVA.

On the brighter side of things, this season of UVA football is mercifully over. No blue turf or Charlotte weed-whacker bowl for the Hoos this year. Which brings us one season closer to the end of the Groh and Groh era. Our basketball team is mediocre, so we can’t really look forward to b-ball all that much. Rough time for the Hoos. Get Littlepage out of there! Go Hoos.

Homer #9: Benny-Who!?!??

Homer #10: Erik the Red

Homer #11: _________

Do you know someone who went to Boston College? Because I don’t. If you, or someone you know, wants to be the BC Homer, e-mail thebaldspot@inrich.com

Homer #12: ________

Even Duke grads admit they do not pay attention to football. I doubt anyone wants to read about Blue Devil football any more than anyone wants to write about it. So, we will spare everyone involved and hold this space open for b-ball season.