Brian Bald
Oct 22, 2008

This blog is dedicated to promoting the ideas of the unqualified and under-informed. With that in mind, “12 Angry Homers” is a weekly feature highlighting the rants and raves of a graduate from each of the 12 ACC schools (note: eventually…we are a few homers short at the moment) as their beloved teams make their way through the football & basketball seasons…

Homer #1: E-Dubs

“If you fire him, they will come.”

The first game after the end of the Bowden era in Clemson brought fans from all over to Tigertown last Saturday to see the new-look Tigers. Unfortunately, this led to the worst traffic I have ever seen in Clemson, and getting in from Atlanta was a nightmare. Everyone was fired up to see the “Willy Korn Show” take the field but unfortunately GT’s D-line had other plans for Mr. Korn. One of GT’s players tackled Korn and he landed funny on his throwing shoulder that resulted in a “bone bruise” that should give Harper starts for a few more weeks.

I loved the enthusiasm on the Clemson sideline this weekend and the play calling improved. We finally got the ball in Aaron Kelly’s hands, which resulted in 7 catches for 122 yards and 2 touchdowns. The biggest improvement was on defense, which did a terrific job against the option attack. Clemson held GT to 2 yards or less in 16 out of 52 carries. The biggest problem with the team has been the same all year which is the weak O-line and the inability to FINISH a game. Clemson has lost their last 3 games by 4, 5, and 3 points all while leading each game in the fourth quarter.

My overall grade for the Tigers last week would be a strong B. I was not expecting a win given all the changes in the program last week and since our best player, Spiller, was out. I can honestly say I think everyone gave 100%, and I was pleased with the play calling. This season is all but over for the Tigers and we will be lucky to go to a mid tier bowl game this year, but I am excited about the future of the program. I think the team will come together in the next few weeks, and the experience the young O-line is getting is paying off. We have a bye week coming up to get ready for a brutal road schedule before ending the season at home. I expect to see a much improved team by the end of the year when Spurrier arrives in Death Valley.

Homer #2: Moncrieffe

Just taking it one week at a time and it keeps looking good. Finally back in the rankings.
Granted, we didn’t have the greatest showing against NC State, but as I always say, “I’d rather win ugly than lose pretty.” Christian Ponder and the rest of the offense seemed to show some growth and took really good care of the ball (finally a Div. I game with no turnovers). Right now the dual-threat status of Ponder is the key to our offense. The kid is tough as nails and is always ready to do what it takes to get the first down or extra couple yards. And, Antone Smith, Preston Parker and Greg Carr are proving to be quite the complements to Ponder’s scrambling abilities. Next week against Va. Tech we’ll need all 4 of them firing on all cylinders.
But in the end the key is that we need to have our offense play like it did this week for the rest of the season and have our defense forget how they played the run this week and start stopping people again. IF, and only IF, we can do those 2 things, we have an excellent chance at running the table, taking the ACC, and heading off to a BCS game.
Finally, in the first week of the BCS, I have once again managed to find myself irreconcilably confused. The AP Poll has us at 24 and the Coaches Poll has us at 23, so how did we end up at 25 in the BCS?

Homer #3: Benz

They got “what [they] deserved.”  A three point loss in an annual three point matchup.

Fresh off disparaging comments from the preseason ACC player-of-the-year about his pee-wee instructor, Tommy Bowden, Clemson was ready to unleash “Thunder” and “Lightning” past Howard’s rock and onto Death Valley field. But there were no bolts or dashes from Davis or Spiller, and the Wreck rambled on.

Clemson amassed 30 yards on 8 carries from James Davis, as Spiller sat the game out and lived up to his record tying third year on All-Unused talent team. Spiller ties James Davis for the record.
Josh Nesbitt is a leader. He took over against BC and lead the team to a crucial first down at the end of the game. He left it all on the field against VPI and wouldn’t let his team quit. And this week, he threw the game winning touchdown to the next coming of Michael Johnson, Demaryius Thomas.

His backfield has the powerful Jonathon Dwyer who jump-started the Georgia Tech offense converting on a 3rd and 31 from the Tech 14 yard line. He recorded his fifth 100 yard rushing game and his sixth 100 all purpose yard game of the season.  He’s a sophomore on a team stacked with sophomore talent.  Things are only going to get better with Coach Paul Johnson and time. 

As for Clemson DC Vic Koenning’s jibber jabber, go sell crazy somewhere else, they’re all full at Clemson.

Homer #4: Beef & Charlie Chalupa

One has to wonder what could’ve been for this Terps team. They beat three ranked teams this season, and they have beaten the last five ranked teams they faced back to last season. Unfortunately, the Terps play to the level of their competition…which means they lose to crapass jokes like Virginia and Middle Tennessee State. Those two losses are crushing because 1) the teams suck and 2) if the Terps had won they probably would be in the top 6 in the country right now and looking at a major BCS bowl. Now, there is still a possibility that the Terps take the ACC and get into the national bowl scene, but I would rather be dreaming about potential matchups with Penn State or Texas for the national championship.  Oh well.

Oh, and DHB is a man among boys.  He makes Chris Turner look like a good quarterback.  Probably the biggest compliment a receiver could get.

Homer #5: Krystal

To say that I wanted to throw my TV out the window and swear off football FOREVER at halftime is an understatement. Duke was beating Miami 17-14! What?!?! It’s DUKE! Seriously????  Marve got pulled early in the 2nd and Jacory Harris, the backup was put in. It would end up being the smartest move this team made all day.

Start of the 3rd quarter didn’t look much better. Duke scored again: 24-14.  Then, Harris proved (as much as he could against Duke) that he was poised and ready to be Miami’s starting QB. He threw for four TDs, and Miami ended up with 420 yards. We pulled off an embarrassing win against the Blue Devils: 49-31. Our defense wasn’t there, and Miami will be lucky to pull off a .500 season. But it looks like the rest of the ACC is falling apart too. Drinks anyone???

Homer #6: Ned Ryerson

That was crushing. It was like the time you went to that middle school dance and totally thought you were going to make out with that girl. You got to dance with her, grabbed a little ass, and thought you were in. Then, you came back from the bathroom and she was making out with that total douche bag who wore hyper color t-shirts. That’s UVA, the douche bag who wore hyper color t-shirts. After the game a fellow UNC alumni told me that he would rather hang out with Duke grads than UVA grads. Jesus, what a statement.

I guess we missed Brandon Tate, I guess our defense thought the game was 58 minutes long. I guess I got sucked into thinking we could sustain a whole mess of injuries, start a bunch of underclassmen, and still win on the road. I guess I got tricked by the good vibes from the Notre Dame and Miami games and didn’t see that we were just a few fortunate plays away from being 3-4.

Now we have to play BC, Maryland, and Georgia Tech. I chalked all those up as wins earlier this season, not so much anymore. Here’s hoping we get to 7 wins and don’t lose to Duke.

Side note, I was at a wedding for the end of the game. Two UNC grads were getting married. We lost right before they cut the cake. Everyone had a look on their face like they were trying to smile, but it was like trying to smile for a family portrait after catching your wife cheating AND learning your daughter is knocked up. Just not genuine. The father of the groom looked like he might throw up.

Homer #7: The Steve Smith

It’s encouraging to see the progress the Wolfpack has made under Tom O’Brien. We are now one of the least penalized teams in the ACC, we haven’t committed a turnover in weeks, and we are running the ball really well (157 yards).

That said, all the credit in the world to Florida State. They won the game, rather than having it handed to them in Amato-Era Wolfpack fashion. There isn’t a lot to criticize on the Wolfpack’s end. I sit here, an arm-chair quarterback, with no “if only we had ...” comments. Although, there was a noticeable drop-off when Nate Irving left the game after re-injuring his ankle. The Noles must have attacked his linebacker replacement 10 times with that full-back screen.

In the end, Christian Ponder avoided the costly mistakes that have plagued him throughout the season, and in a game that was largely mistake-free, FSU showed that they have a little more talent…or experience…or both. Both teams fought hard, and FSU’s kicker made a helluva kick to ice the game. The talent gap is certainly not what it once was, when NC State needed 6 ints from Chris Weinke (and Drew Weatherford for that matter) for the win…now we can play FSU head to head, with an even turnover margin.
I am most curious to see what happens this week at Maryland. The Terps have looked REALLY good. The Terps have looked REALLY bad. It’s largely the same Maryland team that came into Carter-Finley and blew the doors off of us last November. Heyward-Bey is a great talent, and Turner has been solid at QB. I predict that Maryland will spread the field, attack match-ups successfully on offense, and put too much pressure on Russell Wilson. A strong running-game will keep us in it for 3 quarters. Maryland wins: 34-20.

Homer #8: 46 East

I just don’t know what to say anymore.  Wait, do I start off every rant that way?  I think I might…

Putting the Heels in their place is always fun.  They were getting a little big for their britches.  The Tar Holes have some solid young talent, although the Butch Davis hype machine was inflating that talent a little bit in my book.  A win puts the Hoos at 4-3 overall, 2-1 in the ACC.  At least a bowl game is possible now.

Despite this, my Hoos boycott continues.  No way am I getting emotionally invested with this bunch.  Get on the boycott now, this way you can say you stuck with it, even through the good times.  I am not fooled by this win or the 3 straight home W’s.  Mike Groh has no business being an offensive coordinator.  3 points through 59 minutes of play?  Not good.  This win buys Resilient Al another year.  That’s all it does.  It does not prove that we are on the right track.  Wait, Craig Littlepage should add another $3.5 million to the Resilient Al buyout fund.  Why not? The economy is prosperous, let’s throw some more money at our middle of the road coach for when we ultimately have to end this thing.

Let’s take a look at our schedule and see if this trend is going to continue, or if this is just Resilient Al keeping his job.  At Georgia Tech, Miami in Cville, at Wake Forest, Clemson in Cville, and at Va Tech.  The Hoos need 2 more wins in there to make a bowl game.  Miami perhaps, but beyond that it is going to be a stretch.  I hate to constantly disparage Al. I know he works hard and loves the Hoos, but I just don’t see us going anywhere from a middle of the road program.  That’s our ceiling under Groh.  The same way we love having the Fat Bastard at Maryland and the same way I am going to miss Tommy Bowden at Clemson, the Hokies, Heels and other ACC schools love having Groh at UVA. They aren’t worried about the Al Groh Wahoos.

On to the win though.  The return of Cedric Peerman has been huge, absolutely huge.  I don’t know about Ced’s pro potential, and nothing about him wows you except for the fact that he refuses to be tackled.  As the leader of the Hoos boycott, I only watched bits and pieces of the game, but in the moments that I did watch, I saw Ced turn about 3 plays from no gain or a loss into gains of 4-5 yards.  And there was really no doubt that he wasn’t going to bust the ball into the end zone from the one on both touchdowns.  If I was ever going to organize a team of guys to dig trenches and clean toilets, Ced would be the first guy I would call.  Because I know he never quits, loves to mix it up, and isn’t afraid of the dirty work.

Stat line for the “First legit wide receiver UVA will put into the league since Herman Moore” (aka Kevin Ogletree): 6 catches, 72 yards.  Through 7 games, that’s 37 catches for 455 yards and 3 touchdowns.  Catches and yards are good for second in the ACC behind Hakeem Nicks.  He also went over 1,000 yards receiving for his career.  My man.

Homer #9: Benny-Who!?!??

If our offense was water, Bear Grylls would tell me not to drink it for fear of dysteria.  Our offense is stagnant.  If the offense can miraculously mesh, we can still compete for the ACC title.  If not, we have a long tough road through Miami and Tallahassee next week, and I may start talking about basketball.  Somebody in the receiving core needs to step up as a playmaker.  We should either have Virgil and Macho Harris play both ways a la Necessary Roughness, or take a page out of Wazoo’s playbook to get some new blood in there.

Fearing the chop!

Homer #10: Erik the Red

Homer #11: _________

Do you know someone who went to Boston College? Because I don’t. If you, or someone you know, wants to be the BC Homer, e-mail thebaldspot@inrich.com

Homer #12: ________

Even Duke grads admit they do not pay attention to football. I doubt anyone wants to read about Blue Devil football any more than anyone wants to write about it. So, we will spare everyone involved and hold this space open for b-ball season.